Reasons Big Oil and the rest of the U.S. ruling class hate Iran

1. Incredibly, the Iranian government acts as if Iranian oil actually belongs to Iran.

2. We still really, really miss the shah, who acted differently.

3. For some reason, the Iranian government says that the Holocaust of World War II happened in Nazi-occupied Europe, not in Palestine or any other Arab or Muslim country.

4. We are unfamiliar with the term “peaceful purposes.”

5. Since the Pentagon has thousands of nuclear weapons, it seems only fair that Iran should have none.

6. They seem to be preparing to defend themselves against the attack we are always threatening.

7. Just because the election in Iran wasn’t fixed, doesn’t mean we can’t say it was. Hello?

8. It seems highly unlikely that the Iranian government plans to buy real estate securities from Wall St.

9. If U.S. workers blame Iran for all their problems, the downside is what?

10. Iran’s solidarity with Lebanon and Palestine gives us the heebie-jeebies.